排版 | AiBrain 编辑团队
Iain C. Bruce教授祖籍英国，现任Neuroscience Bulletin（NB）执行副主编（2011年8月至今），北京大学分子医学研究所客座教授，曾任浙江大学医学院教授、江南大学访问教授、香港大学副教授。从事生命科学英文论文写作教学30余年，在香港大学、台湾成功大学、浙江大学和北京大学开设生物学专业英文论文写作课程，并著有《生命科学论文写作指南》一书，广受好评。2006年以来，他为北京大学和浙江大学科研人员修改润色生命科学论文数百篇；为NB修改润色论文1400余篇，为保障NB文章的发表质量，做出了突出贡献。
2023年，时值Iain C. Bruce教授担任NB执行副主编12周年，NB编辑部特邀请他整理出他多年的工作心得，以“NB卓越论文写作技能提升”栏目在NB微信订阅号“神经小灵通”系列发表。其内容为生命科学英文论文撰写中的常见错误纠正等，专门针对中国生命科学界的青年学者和研究生。
希望此栏目能对大家的英文论文写作技能提升有所助益，敬请大家持续关注。
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往期：
本期：
NB卓越论文写作技能提升-9︱不要使用ETC/AND SO ON
NB卓越论文写作技能提升-10︱慎用倒装句！
Iain C. Bruce 课堂
ETC/AND SO ON（等/...）
To most readers, the use of et cetera is the sign of a lazy mind. The writer seems to say, I can think of a few items, but don’t want to make the effort to complete the list. You (the reader) should know them anyway. If it is important, say, to list the established differential diagnoses in your case, make the list complete. In most biomedical studies, the author wants to select from a list the most important items related to the current study. In this situation, etc is not needed. It is enough to say … other factors, such as a, b, and c, …, or … underlying mechanisms, including a, b, and c …, or … alternative pathways, for example a, b, or c ….
Strunk and White state: “In formal writing, etc.is a misfit. An item important enough to call foretc. is probably important enough to be named.” [Strunk W, White EB (2000) The Elements of Style. Fourth Edition, Penguin Books, New York, first published in 1913, remains the iconic reference for style in general English writing].
Never end a partial list with etc or and so on, it creates a bad impression.
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EXAMPLES
“On the other hand, X reduces the amountof antioxidants including glutathione, superoxide dismutase and so on.”
On the other hand, X reduces the levels of antioxidants such as glutathione and superoxide dismutase.
“These proteins are present in blood, and the main protein of nomal human and animals plasma is AZ, which plays an essential role in modulating cellular signaling in embryonic development, tumorigenesis, angiogenesis and so on.”
These proteins are present in blood, and the main protein in normal mammalian plasma is AZ, which plays an essential role in modulating cellular signaling in processes such as embryonic development, tumorigenesis, and angiogenesis.
“…coagulatory factors such as fresh frozen factor, fibrinogen and blood platelet etc., were used.”
…the coagulatory factors fresh frozen factor, fibrinogen, and platelets were used.
[Note: in this example, these three were the only ones used – they were not part of a longer list of materials.]
“…inflammation occurs in various organs such as the skin, kidney, intracranium, gastrointestinal tract, genital organs, gallbladder, etc.”
…inflammation occurs at various sites, including the skin, kidney, brain, gastrointestinal tract, genitalia, and gallbladder.
[Note: The word intracranium is not in my medical dictionary.]
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知识点总结
1、使用et cetera会给人留下一种懒得思考的印象；
2、如果所列举的项目是重要的，请将项目列举完整；
3、可以采用下面3种形式来代替etc.：
... other factors, such as a, b, and c …
… underlying mechanisms, including a, b, and c …
… alternative pathways, for example a, b, or c ….
4、早在1913年首版的英文写作类标杆级别的The Elements of Style一书中，作者就曾指出，在正式写作中，使用etc.是不合适的；
5、现在已经极少使用intracranium这个词，更常使用的是intracranial。
Iain C. Bruce 课堂
SENTENCE INVERSION（倒装句）
While writing an essay for an English class, it may be considered elegant to invert the order of events, as in the phrases you have just read, or in Meanwhile, in the countryside, the air was clear and fresh. This might score a few more TESL@ points than The air was clear and freshin the countryside. But in biomedical writing, the reader wants to get to the point immediately, and such stylistic tricks simply make the sentence more difficult for the reader, as in Meanwhile, prior to calculating the probability density during epoch t1 with algorithm X, we evaluated the background density at t-10[many TESL points, but unclear]. In my opinion, lead-in words like meanwhile are rarely needed, and writing in the order of events is clearer: We evaluated the background probability density at t-10 and then calculated the density at t1 with algorithm X [few TESL points, but clear].
@TESL: Teaching English as a Second Language
When using general English, it is usual to begin by setting the scene and gradually focusing in on the main event or character, as in the famously awful opening words “It was a dark and stormy night…” [The sentence unfortunately continues: “the rain fell in torrents — except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness. From: Lytton EB (1830) Paul Clifford. Cassell, New York]. But in biomedical writing, we need to get to the point immediately, and leave the details until later, as in Our main finding was that… in the Discussion, or The data from paradigm A were… in the Results, to be followed later by exceptions and details.
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EXAMPLES
“At different levels, the pressure was stabilized for 10 min.”
The pressure was stabilized at different levels for 10 min.
“In dopamine release from the striatum, two specific mechanisms have been reported.”
Two specific mechanisms of dopamine release from the striatum have been reported.
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知识点总结
1、与文学写作需要先营造意境不同，论文写作则需要尽可能有效地传达信息；
2、论文写作需要立刻切入主题，随后再补充细枝末节；
3、论文写作中尽量不使用meanwhile；
4、论文写作中慎用倒装句。
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